


Butt stuff

by grapehyasynth



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: David Rose is a Good Person, Discussion of Anal Sex, Discussions of Identity, Early Relationship, Established Relationship, M/M, No actual sex is had sorry my dears, POV David Rose, Patrick Brewer is Going Through A Lot of New Things, Sex Talk, Uncertainty, Vulnerability, discussion of sexual preferences, referenced internalized homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:33:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28139994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grapehyasynth/pseuds/grapehyasynth
Summary: In the early days of their relationship, Patrick and David have a conversation about a certain kind of sex that Patrick's just not quite sure about.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Comments: 62
Kudos: 256





	Butt stuff

**Author's Note:**

> Rated this M for discussions of anal sex but no actual sex is had in this fic (sorry/you're welcome, depending on your preference). I love smut for these babes but I also identify with/as being, frankly, sometimes very intimidated by the thought of sex, and that blossomed into Patrick experiencing something similar. You can read his feelings in this a lot of different ways, and I hope you will! I'm also, as usual, uncertain about the tags, so lmn if you think I've missed any that could be helpful.

They’re in Patrick’s bed - well, more _on_ the bed than _in_ bed, because David’s foot is the only part of him that’s covered by the sheet. Most of him is covered by Patrick, who is draped over David’s side, his cheek on David’s chest. They’re both still naked in the rare peace of a Ray-free weekend. (Patrick has wedged a chair under the doorknob just in case; they’ve learned the hard way that Ray’s schedule is subject to change on a whim.) 

David is tracing patterns on Patrick’s bare back, staring at the ceiling and feeling oh so grateful there’s no mirror up there, when Patrick clears his throat. 

“There’s - there’s something I’ve been meaning to talk about. With you.” 

David hopes his full-face cringe doesn’t telegraph itself into the rest of his body. No good conversation has ever started like that. “O-okay.” 

Patrick spreads his hand over David’s ribs, the sensation just shy of tickling. “Um. God, there’s no good way to say this.” 

“Can you say _something_ so that I have something specific to spiral about, rather than this - this - general, all-consuming panic?” David means for it to come out like a joke, but he’s pretty sure he’s missed the mark. 

“Okay. I just - You know I’ve been enjoying everything we’ve been doing.” 

“Can I at least sit up, if you’re breaking up with me?”

“I’m _not_ breaking up with you,” Patrick laughs, and he pushes David back down by the shoulders. Now at least they can look at each other, though maybe that’s worse; Patrick’s eyes are worried as they flit over David’s face. “I’m, um, kind of nervous _you’ll_ break up with _me_.”

It’s far too soon in the relationship for David to make clear to Patrick just how unlikely that is, if Patrick doesn’t already know. There’s desperate and then there’s _pathetic_. “Why don’t you tell me and _then_ I’ll let you know if it’s a dealbreaker.” 

“Comforting,” Patrick snorts. “Okay. I’m not sure if I - the thing with - um. I’ve been feeling uncertain about... about anal sex.” 

“That’s it?” David blurts out, before he can help himself; the relief is too strong. 

“What do you mean, _that’s it_?” Patrick demands. 

“Oh my god, I’m not - I didn’t mean to minimize your - that’s just - that’s not a dealbreaker, Patrick.” 

Patrick frowns and looks down at where his hand is spread on David’s chest. “I don’t know, David, it kind of feels like a big deal.” 

David swallows. He’s doing this wrong. He’s never really had someone guide him through this; he’s never really felt like he needed that, which he knows is its own privilege. His own journey of sexual discovery and identity had been about as polar from Patrick’s as possible, filled with certainty and eagerness and, probably, an excessive lack of caution. “Sorry. I just - wanted that to be clear. That that - whatever you’re feeling or thinking about anal, it’s not a dealbreaker. For me. But you can - say more about it, if you want.” 

“I-” Patrick’s mouth searches for words for a moment, then he shuts it and his jaw clenches. David reaches up to trace the tense muscles there and Patrick tips his head into the touch. “I mean it, when I say I like the things we do together. I like you, and I want you, and I want to do everything with you, but when I think about - about doing _that_ , it just feels-” He shakes his head a little, and his cheeks are flushed, and not in an I’m-so-turned-on kind of way. “It feels...bigger than I know how to deal with. Scarier.” 

“Okay, um.” David is realizing he thinks of Patrick as steady, afraid of nothing; seeing him twisted up like this makes David like him more, if anything. “Then that’s not something we need to do. It’s not for everyone.” 

Patrick huffs. “David.” 

“What?” David demands. “You said you’re not into it, so we don’t do it!” 

“I don’t - I don’t _know_ that I’m not into it!” Patrick presses himself up so he’s properly sitting, still skin-to-skin with David along their hips and legs. “I just...don’t know that I _am_. But I can’t just - not do it.” 

David blinks. “Um, why not?” 

“What if it’s - what if the reason I get, I don’t know, anxious, when I think about doing that, is because I’ve still got some... internalized shame, or self-loathing, or something. I mean, I - you know how eager I was to blow you-” 

“I remember,” David smirks. 

“But before we did that, the first time, I honestly expected to feel, like - _wrong_. And I didn’t! Everything we’ve done has felt easier than I expected. So what is it about _this_ that’s messing with my head?” 

David hums and drifts his finger up the length of the arm that’s holding Patrick up. “Um, this is a very valid and important line of inquiry, and if it _is_ internalized homophobia, or if it’s something else altogether, that’s something we can talk about. And we could work up to it, or never talk about it again, or talk about it and decide you’re not into it - there’s no wrong answer here.”

“You sound like you’ve swallowed a therapist.” 

“Okay, that was only once.” He rolls his eyes at Patrick’s expression. “Okay, three times, but it’s not a big deal, we’re talking about you right now, honey.” 

“But what about-” Patrick halts and blows out a breath, looking frustrated. “Listen, I know this sounds stupid, but how can I - how can I be _gay_ if I’m not - if I don’t-” 

David catches the righteous outburst before it leaves his mouth, settling instead on a slightly gentler, “Not liking anal does not make you less gay. Literally nothing could make you less gay. I’m serious!” he insists, tweaking the wrinkly bit of Patrick’s elbow as Patrick sighs. “You could literally never kiss or date or hook up with a man and you’d still be gay. You’re gay unless, someday, you decide that word’s not right for you, and then you take it from there, and you figure it out.” 

“ _You_ like it, though,” Patrick mumbles. 

“I do.” David twists his mouth to the side, trying to get a grasp of where Patrick’s thoughts are at. “But it’s - it’s not the point, or the goal, or something. Anal sex is just - one way of chasing pleasure.”

“But don’t you think you’ll miss it? If I decide that I don’t want to ever - do anal?” It looks painful, as he forces those last few words out, and David is so proud of him.

“Um, no, I think I’ll be okay,” David smiles. “I mean, I _do_ like it. I like it a lot. But if the choice is between anal with a random or no anal with you? It’s not even a competition.” Patrick actually looks pleased at this, which should really be a low moment for both of them, but suddenly something clicks and David gasps. “Oh my god, so when you said you thought I’d break up with you-” 

“It’s not that unreasonable of a fear!” Patrick says, his voice going a little high in his defensiveness. “If you feel like you’re missing out, with me, then someday, I don’t know, maybe you’ll decide it’s not worth it.” 

“Mmm-mm, no, come here,” David murmurs, and he brings Patrick back down to his chest, needing to be close to him, needing the reassurance of his warmth and weight. It’s entirely compassion for Patrick that has David’s chest aching and not at all the way he understands his concern. He’s never been afraid someone would dump him for _un_ willingness to perform a sex act, but that underlying expectation that something fundamental about you will be the thing that leads you to be alone again? _That_ he gets. “First, I’m sorry that someone, or society, or whatever, made you think that your happiness and comfort aren’t just as important as your partner’s, because they are.” 

“David,” Patrick grumbles against David’s neck, where he’s maybe holding him a bit too tight. 

“Second, if you were a - a _vegan_ , or something, I wouldn’t try to make you eat meat just because _I_ like it, not if you’ve told me that you don’t!” 

“Not even a... thick juicy sausage?” 

“ _Alright_ , wrong metaphor,” he says, and he pretends to push Patrick away, but his boyfriend comes back, curling around him. “The point stands, though!” 

Patrick worries at his lower lip. “But just the other day you were talking about the sex you had with Erik von Detten in Sao Paulo and you ran into the stop sign outside our store because you totally zoned out, just reminiscing on it. If I can’t give that to you-” 

“Patrick,” David says, too forcefully, and he’s going to regret this but maybe a little vulnerability is what they both need. “I have been gone on you since before we kissed. Like, in too deep, pictures in my locker, hearts on my notebooks, _gone_. Um - I’m sorry if I... if I haven’t made that clear. I don’t _want_ marathon sex in exotic locations with you. I mean, I’ll take it, if that’s an option, but I’m not - I want to be with you in a way that’s more important than any specific aspect of what we do in our relationship. If that.... If that makes any sense?” 

Patrick’s face has gone unbearably fond, and David gets to see it in high-def for a moment before Patrick’s kissing him, soft and long. 

“Thank you,” Patrick murmurs, with a second quick kiss to the corner of David’s mouth. “That helps.” 

“As a friend recently told me,” David goes on, high on the hubris of being helpful and scared of the size and depth of Patrick’s eyes, “none of us can promise how we’re going to feel ten years from now or next week or even tomorrow, but for today, I can tell you that that’s not a dealbreaker for me, and I don’t see it being a dealbreaker in the future. And believe me, I have a _lot_ of dealbreakers.” 

Patrick’s face twitches in a way that David knows means they’re going to circle back to the dealbreakers thing before too long, but he just says, “It must be exhausting, David. To be so wise and kind.” 

He hums. “My burden to bear.” 

“Though I take issue with being referred to as _a friend_ when you’re parroting my words back at me.” 

“They were good words,” David shrugs. “Also, I _am_ exhausted, so I’d love it if my _friend_ would go grab me a water.” 

Patrick puffs out a laugh but rolls over and is halfway off the bed before David catches his hand. 

“Um, so, because I feel like this is only the first conversation of many about this, I think it’s probably a good idea if we’re clear on keeping each other updated on our likes and dislikes?” 

Patrick smiles and squeezes his fingers. “I think that’s a great idea, David.” 

“So. In the interest of starting that. Am I still allowed to compliment your butt?”

Patrick laughs out loud, and he’d been so close to crying mere moments ago, and David can never tell him that there are absolutely no dealbreakers so long as he keeps laughing like that. “Yes, David. I like it when you compliment my butt.” He crawls back onto the bed and straddles David. “I also like it when you touch my butt, though maybe just - um-” 

“No crack?” David guesses, sliding his hands over Patrick’s solid hips and around to cup his ass. 

“For now, at least,” Patrick nods, and he kisses David, and David accepts that his request for water might go unfulfilled. Then Patrick licks into David’s mouth and makes a funny growling sound and says, in the most ridiculous accent, “Aye, David, treasure my booty!” 

“Ummm, nope, that’s a real quick dislike from me!” 

**Author's Note:**

> I am hundo p leaving it open-ended as to whether Patrick decides he's into anal or not! Open-ended. Heheh. Heh.


End file.
